Empathy in autistic children may look different, but it is very much present. It consists of two parts: emotional empathy, the ability to feel what others feel; and cognitive empathy, the ability to understand what others feel. Many autistic children experience emotions deeply, meaning their emotional empathy is often strong. However, they may have difficulty reading facial expressions, body language, or social cues, which can make it harder to interpret others’ feelings. This doesn’t mean they don’t care—it simply means they may need support in learning how to express empathy in ways that others recognize.
The good news is that empathy can absolutely be taught—and often very effectively—with the right approach. Autistic children can learn to recognize emotions in others, understand different perspectives, and respond in meaningful ways, such as offering comfort, providing help, or asking questions.
Parents and educators can support this by using simple, clear language to label emotions; for example: “She is crying. She feels sad.” Real-life moments are powerful teaching opportunities. When someone is upset, gently guide the child by asking, “What can we do to help?” Teaching simple scripts like “Are you okay?” or “Do you need help?” provides children with practical tools for social situations. Visual supports, such as social stories, picture cards, and role-playing activities, can also make learning more concrete and accessible. Most importantly, modeling empathy in everyday interactions—like saying, “I see you’re frustrated; I’m here to help”—shows children what empathy looks like in action.
It’s important to remember that progress may be gradual, and that’s completely okay. Autistic children may express empathy in ways that differ from typical expectations, such as avoiding eye contact or bypassing traditional social responses. With patience, understanding, and consistent support, many autistic children grow into deeply caring and compassionate individuals.